We thought this was a great idea for Family Day. This post was originally published on mominformed.com
Conversing with your children can be hard at times. This is especially true for young children who may have only recently learned how to speak in full sentences. Thinking about meaningful questions to ask kids, is important for their development.
I know that I struggle to have good conversations with full-grown adults, let alone children. You may feel the same way. Just like you, I love my little ones, and I want what’s best for them.
Having meaningful conversations is essential for their development, as well as building the parent-child relationship. So I’ve come up with some questions that can lead to meaningful, development- and relationship-enhancing conversations.
Why We Should Engage Our Kids With Questions
I’ve found that it is a lot easier to feel motivated to take action when I know the reason behind the practices. So before I give a list of my question ideas, I want to provide you with a background on why using these questions is essential.
Research has shown that when kids have brief, intensive conversations with adults, rare words are emphasized. Errors are corrected by being repeated correctly, and open-ended questions are used.
Children also have improved expressive vocabulary development. This coincides well with Vygotsky’s theory that children learn best through social interaction.
Scholars on the topic of language development shed light on how this can be accomplished, suggesting some ways that parents can encourage language development while conversing with their kids:
utilize rich vocabulary,
talk about the child’s interests,
ask open-ended questions,
take turns listening and speaking, and
ask questions that encourage thinking.
These suggestions may seem simple, but they can make a gigantic difference. They are also not easy to do, even though they are straightforward. Having a handy list of questions at your disposal can make the process quite a bit easier.
So, without further ado, here are some questions you can ask your children to enrich their language development and relationship with them.
Get To Know You Questions For Kids
When getting to know your child, focus on learning about their likes and dislikes. I have many examples to get you started, but you probably know best which questions will get your child talking.
These questions are mostly closed-ended because they aim at giving you information about your child. But you can use these as conversation starters and turn them into a back-and-forth exchange.
Simply ask “why” when they respond with their answer. Also, I included questions that focus on the child’s likes and interests, but you can also learn about their dislikes and disinterests simply by flipping the question around.
Sometimes kids can be reluctant to have conversations with their parents. But if you can catch them off guard with a funny question and get them laughing, you might be able to trick them into talking to you.
Here are some questions to get you started. Because kids vary so much by age, I’ll start with some funny and silly questions you can ask older kids.
Who would win in a magical duel: Harry Potter or Mary Poppins?
Who would you rather hang out with? Lord Farquaad or Gaston?
If you could live in any movie, but you had to go as the bad guy, which movie would you want to live in?
If you had to have one embarrassing quality to have all the money in the world, what would it be?
If you could dance all the time without getting tired, would you?
What if you had magical powers, but you had to sleep 90% of the time. Would you want them?
If you could have a magical remote that could fast-forward through school, but you could never eat at McDonald’s again, would you do it?
If you could eat as much dessert as you wanted every day, but also had to go to the dentist every day, would you do it?
What would the world be like if little tiny leprechauns were in charge?
What would the world be like if children were in charge of their parents?
If you were an ogre, what would be your name?
If you were a superhero, what would be your superpower and your weakness?
If you could have Disneyland all to yourself whenever you want, but you could only communicate by singing Disney songs, would you?
If you could be a famous movie star, but you had to always smell like stinky feet, would you?
If you could eat anything you wanted, but you had to eat at least one worm a day, would you?
If you could fly, but you had to always have really bad breath, would you?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
If you could eat anything every day, what would it be?
If you could get rid of anything in the world, what would it be?
If you could be invisible whenever you want, but you had to sweat constantly, would you?
Who would win in a sword fight: Robin Hood, or Peter Pan?
Who would win in a dance battle: Snow White or Winnie the Pooh?
Here are some great questions to ask your child about their daily life and routine. Asking these questions can give you a window into your child’s life. Let them know that you care about them, even when it comes to ordinary things in their life.
What do you do first thing in the morning, after you wake up?
Are you a morning person, or a night person?
When do you get dressed for your day?
How often do you brush your teeth?
Do you like breakfast?
How do you make sure you’re ready for school on time?
How do you get to school?
Who do you sit by on the bus to school?
What do you do when you get to school?
What’s your favorite thing to do at school?
What is your least favorite thing to do at school?
What’s your schedule like on a typical school day?
When you get home from school, what’s the first thing you do?
What do you look forward to doing most after school each day?
What’s your favorite after-school snack?
When do you do homework?
How long do you spend doing homework?
When do you watch TV?
How long do you watch TV after school?
Do you like to hang out with friends after school?
Do you ever study with your friends after school?
Do you practice any instruments after school?
Do you have any special hobbies you do after school?
How often do you play video games?
How often do you look at social media?
What’s your favorite way to help with dinner?
Do you have a favorite dinner?
Do you like to watch shows while you eat dinner?
Do you like to talk while you eat dinner?
What do you like to talk about during dinner?
What’s your favorite way to help clean up after dinner?
Would you rather play a board game or a card game?
Would you rather play a video game or look at social media?
Would you rather play by yourself or play with friends?
Would you rather wake up early or sleep in?
Would you rather go to bed early or go to bed late?
Would you rather read a book or watch a show?
Would you rather eat macaroni or chicken nuggets?
Would you rather eat at Wendy’s or McDonald’s?
Would you rather live somewhere hot or somewhere cold?
Would you rather stay at home or go to school?
Would you rather play sports or read books?
Would you rather write a book report or do a math assignment?
Would you rather learn about History or English?
Would you rather learn to speak Chinese or Italian?
Would you rather learn to speak Russian or Tagalog?
Would you rather go to Italy or Germany?
Would you rather run a marathon or swim a mile?
Would you rather go to the zoo or go to an amusement park?
Would you rather go bowling or go to an arcade?
Would you rather play hide and seek or tag?
Would you rather wear a dress or pants?
Would you rather eat chips or candy?
Conclusion
Having conversations with kids is vital for their language, cognitive, and social development. Additionally, they can learn conversation skills, which are crucial to have later in life.
It also builds your relationship with your child. You can learn a lot about your child that you probably didn’t know by asking them these questions. Whether they are 2 or 17, it’s always a good idea to talk to your child.
Elizabeth Miller is passionate about motherhood, both personally and professionally. She is mom to a toddler and an infant and has a bachelor’s degree in Marriage and Family Studies. She is also currently working toward her master’s degree in Human Development and Family Studies.
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